It's times like these - Changes and Wild Horses...

It's August...oh August, how I have dreaded you and yet anticipated you for so long. I leave for Brenham in a few weeks...by "leave" I mean move...for 9 months...to attend the school of supernatural ministry...yep. I've never lived without my family before, this will be the biggest adjustment for sure...Crys and I are super close, she's my other half...and my mom is my everyday rock and friend...how do I live for 9 months without seeing them every day? They are the last people I talk to before I go to bed, and the first when I wake up....I love going into my kitchen in the mornings after I wake and chatting with my mom, hearing how her morning has been so far. Or staying up to the early morning hours with my sister, talking about life, love, guys, God and the like...or laughing at our crazy jokes and banter that only we would find funny. I'm going to miss those times. I'm also going to miss my kitty Daisy coming up to the spot on the sofa where she knows I sit, and waiting there until I pet her. I know it's only 9 months, but when you think of waking up and going about your days without the people who you love the most, and who know you the best, 9 months feels like a lot longer. I kind of had an emotional freak out last night about it all...Complete with crying and a whole lot of ranting...I do that every now and then lol. It's getting closer to crunch time and I’m not good at dealing with things sometimes, I’ve been too nervous to really talk about it or even really acknowledge that I’m moving, I mean we say it around the house, but it just seems like some far off thing...when in reality it's only a few weeks away now. We are going to plan a going away party of sorts at my church...this freaks me out because it means it's real...and well, I’m scared of new things sometimes. I'm terrified that I won't fit there, while yes I have met the people there and they are all incredibly sweet and kind, and my cousins and aunt and uncle live there and go to the church that the school is run by, I’m still scared that Brenham and ministry school won't fit me. I guess that's the risk you take when you move, eh?


"'Cause it's been fear that ties me down to everything
But it's been love, Your love, that cuts the strings

So long status quo
I think I just let go
You make me want to be brave
The way it always was
Is no longer good enough
You make me want to be brave
Brave, brave

I am small
And I speak when I'm spoken to
But I am willing to risk it all
I say Your name
Just Your name and I'm ready to jump
Even ready to fall..." - "Brave" - Nichole Nordeman



Life is funny, we all take such different paths than we expected...we end up in such different places in such a short amount of time...last year to this year is like a complete 180...instead of sparkly unicorns like last year, I am now being given wild horses..And I’m becoming more and more okay with that. Honestly, this was so not my plan, I was supposed to be in broadcasting school right now...but God had a different idea. I love that God brings in the most random unexpected things to you when you need them the most, and that's what this school is for me...it's God answering my prayers for new doors and opportunities...exciting things. So I am humbled and grateful for this new door....Lord only knows what's behind it. I know I do not want to be a preacher of any kind; it's just not me...being a P.K. for 10 years and counting is enough thank you. But I am going because I long to become stronger in my walk with God. I want to know what it is to hear the Spirit, and respond to His nudges. I want to become a spiritually strong woman of God. I want to grow, and dive, and immerse myself in all God is...I want to feel His love pouring out on me. I want to spend my days in His presence alongside other likeminded people, learning about God's Truth. I want to come back home a more Christ centered person, wise in God, and more at peace. I just want the Spirit of the Living God to fall on me like an unquenchable fire, burning me up until I burst with His light. I want to be refreshed; I need to be reborn in Him. I want God to baptize my heart, soul, and mind. I want revelations, I want freedom, and I want knowledge. I want God. And all this, is why I am moving...why I am leaving what I know for 9 months, why I am stepping out in blind faith and trusting God with all I am...holding to Him while I walk this new and beautiful, uncomfortable, and confusing, exciting path. May God honor it and use every part of my story for His glory. -




"I, I'm a new day rising
I'm a brand new sky to hang
The stars upon tonight

I, I'm a little divided
Should I stay or run away
Leave it all behind

It's times like these you learn to live again
It's times like these you give and give again
It's times like these you learn to love again
It's times like these time and time again" - "Times Like These" - Foo Fighters







~Cecily Priscilla